In this post, my twin sister Michelle and I discuss how we maintain a healthy relationship with social media. This is a nice follow up to my post on digital minimalism.


One of the first steps to building a good relationship with social media is curating your feed/timeline.

Michelle talks about how she prioritizes the voices of black women and nonbinary people. This makes it a lot easier to choose who you follow and listen to.


I mention how I used to struggle with unfollowing people online especially other creators. After my time of social media, I don’t have that fear anymore. It doesn’t always mean that the people you don’t follow are toxic. I want to be an active follower and so the better question is “Is this content that I actively want to engage with?”

Set the tone for your audience

As creators, we both agreed that you give your audience an idea of what your platform is both from what is said and unsaid. We have learnt to create a “vibe” that people can recognize. That way, our community knows how to engage with our content.

What are your non-negotiables?

Here, Michelle brings up the debate on whether you can separate the art from the artist. Her stance remains that regardless of whether your work is political, everything is intertwined. Therefore, there are certain platforms she will disengage from if their politics is not aligned with her personal values.

What does social media mean to you?

I mention that I value knowing what each social media platform is for me. For example,

  • Pinterest is for inspiration
  • YouTube is for entertainment
  • Instagram is for audience engagement

Having these roles in mind makes it easier for me to weed out the elements of these platforms that I don’t like.

The role of communication and support

Michelle mentions that clarity on your boundaries with social media makes it easier to communicate them to others. We are able to seek support from others because they know what we want amplified or minimized.

Real time evaluation

We discuss our thoughts and feelings towards the content we consume in real time. This avenue to externalize our doubts or reactions gives us room to check each other with love and curate our online experience even more.

Reflect and digest

If you don’t have the opportunity to speak to someone as you consume, give yourself some moments of reflection afterwards. Take some notes, create some journaling prompts or record a voice note of what came up after engaging with that content.

It is okay not to know everything that is going on everywhere in the world 24/7. I disengage when I cannot consume any more and often, I’ll ask Michelle to keep me in the loop on what’s relevant.

Final thoughts

This is just a short summary of what we discussed in the video but I’d highly recommend watching it for the full picture of what we discussed.

Our question for you: How has your relationship with social media changed since the panoramic? Let me know in the comments down below.

Make sure to follow Michelle on Instagram and her blog for her wonderful writing and fashion content.

“Always remember that your hair is your crown and your body is a temple; embrace it, love it and take care of it.”

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